We are required to inform you that these Foretellings are works of satire and are not for the faint of heart. Due to their content they should not be read by anyone. Please enjoy at your own risk. -The EditorGreetings Youth Rashaan Melvin Jersey , Raider Nation! It is I, the eighth wonder of the world, the man who looks like money and smells like money because he is money, Mr. Friday Morning, Raiderdamus the Great and Powerful. I come to you today after a long week, ready for another Raiders game to come one step closer to the #1 overall draft pick.I have my own ideas about how the game will go, but nobody cares about them. You are all here to listen to the words of the Great Beyond, who should be well-rested after a week and a half off. Here is what the Great Old One had to say:“You’re back! After that last debacle, I thought you’d have thrown yourself into the Bay. But I suppose you have a job to do, and so do I. You know, as we get closer to the end of the year, I find myself getting into the Holiday spirit. For every win the Raiders get this year, I’llput away one dollar and get them a nice present. So far, they’re getting a McChicken. Merry Christmas, Raiders. Maybe you’ll work your way up to a Bacon McDouble by the time the season comes to an end.Bur who you got this week? The Chargers? Again? This is really getting old, you know. Well, let’s clown on some fools.In the year 2001, the then-San Diego Chargers drafted Drew Brees in the second round, after drafting LaDainian Tomlinson in the first. Michael Vick was the first player drafted in that year, but in hindsight the argument can be made that Brees should have been the first player off the board. The Chargers, being the bastions of football intelligence that they are, gave up on Brees after only four years in favor of this man:Here, Philip Rivers celebrates one of the five things that went right for the Chargers in the 2013 season. “Yelling is like talking, but louder!” he tells his teammates on the sideline.Here Womens Frostee Rucker Jersey , Rivers has just emerged from the maternal warmth of the Matrix for the first time, and begins learning how to use his eyes.Here, one of Rivers’ 83 children has run onto the field with a homework assignment of Common Core math, requesting Rivers’ assistance. Rivers rejects his plea, because nobody fucking knows how to do Common Core math and also because it is third down.There is no denying that Rivers is at least part owner of the Raiders after pushing their shit in for the last fourteen years, but the question one must ask the Chargers is what the hell were they thinking getting rid of Drew Brees? How many Super Bowls would the Chargers have with Brees over the length of his Hall of Fame career? 3? 4? We’ll never know, because the Chargers are complete imbeciles. When people list the great quarterbacks of the last 20 years, Brees almost always gets mentioned. Does Rivers? Probably not. Rivers is, however, near the top of the Prolific Sex Machines list, right behind Antonio Cromartie and right in front of Osama Bin Laden. Get up, get on up, hey! Here is footage of Rivers’ reaction whenever he comes home and finds his 117 children are in bed, but his wife is still awake:The US will pull out of Afghanistan before Rivers will pull out of his wife. Even Rivers has his limits, though, and things can get too hot even for him.Keeping Rivers over Brees is still a better decision than the one that started all this mess in the first place:In fact, the only Chargers move dumber than drafting Leaf was the decision to leave beautiful San Diego and move to the brutal hellscape of Los Angeles, where nobody likes them and they play in front of hostile crowds every week of the year. San Diego is a lovely place. As you drive towards San Diego from the east, you pass some of the most wondrous country in the world as soon as you get out of the Cleveland National Forest, which is where the Moon landing was filmed by Stanley Kubrick in 1969. It’s horse country closer to San Diego, and it’s lush and pleasing to the eye. In the olden days, poor people had horses and only the rich had cars. Now the poor all have cars, but only the rich have horses. My, how the stables have turned.But now Youth Gabe Jackson Jersey , the Chargers are basically an AAA team, playing in a tiny, shitty soccer stadium in front of sixteen people, fifteen of whom are stadium employees. The last time anyone had a good time at a Charger game, he was whackin’ it to some cheerleaders and then he got fired. A more proper punishment would have been to force him to keep watching the Chargers.The last time the Chargers had the number one overall pick, they took Eli Manning. But his daddy wouldn’t let him play there, which is why they got Rivers instead and why Tom Brady has three Super Bowl losses instead of just one. Joey Bosa’s dad also won’t let him play for the Chargers, but Signore Bosa is not a former famous NFL player, and so Joey must do things in a more bold fashion, by faking an injury and sitting on his couch doing nothing whatsoever until the season is over. Surely Dean Spanos will wake up with a horse’s head in his bed any day now.If this is how Nick Bosa’s family handles things, sign me up for a heaping helping of Ed Oliver. Mark Davis is too gentle a soul to deal with skullduggery of that magnitude.Still, the Raiders are tanking, and not because they’re trying, but just because they suck that much. Reggie Nelson is so old, the first thing he bought with his NFL money was his freedom. He is so old, he farts dust. He is so old, his Social Security number is 4. All those Renaissance paintings show naked boobs because Reggie Nelson was there, making sure nobody got covered.Chargers win, 34-16.” Coming into the 2018 season, the Raiders weren’t expected to have to target a wide receiver in the Draft. They had a #1 receiver in Amari Cooper, as well as a veteran in Jordy Nelson and another talented wideout in Martavis Bryant. But Cooper is gone, Nelson’s future isn’t clear and Bryant may have suffered a serious knee injury in the last game. So, wide receiver has become a position of need for the Raiders suddenly. While it may not be as big a need as certain positions on the defense, with three first-rounders the Raiders have plenty of options.Luckily Authentic Tahir Whitehead Jersey , there are plenty of solid receivers in the coming draft. Here are a few guys the Raiders might consider:N’Keal Harry, Arizona StateOf all the receivers in the draft, Harry is my favorite. He is 6’4” and 213 pounds, so he has the big body and frame to go up and get contested passes and to be a serious red zone threat. Harry reminds me of Tim Brown, in that he isn’t the fastest or the quickest guy, but he is dependable with great hands and an intellectual, clinical knowledge of how to play the position. Harry also doubles as a terrific punt returner.Harry is the sort of receiver that his team targets over, and over, and over again, because nobody can stop him. He can struggle to get open against faster corners, and he needs to be more physical in blocking, and also needs to continue to expand his route tree. This year, Harry is playing under coach Herm Edwards in Tempe, so he has a taste of the pro game and what is required of a professional receiver. The best modern comparison that comes to mind for me is prime Demaryius Thomas- a volume receiver with reliable hands and physical prowess. Prime Brandon Marshall also seems a fit for Harry’s skillset.AJ Brown, Ole MissWhile Harry has been projected at any number of spots in the first round, Brown is universally considered a top-10 pick. He might be the most prototypical receiver in the draft, at 6’1” and 225 with 4.5 speed. He’s not a burner, but has the ball skills and quickness to make an impact in the NFL. Brown is strong and difficult to bring down, and also presents a challenge to defensive backs looking to get off his blocking. Brown consistently fights for extra yardage and excels at running after the catch, making him an ideal fit for a team that likes to throw quick, short strikes rather than rely on longer developing plays.Parris Campbell, Ohio StateIf you’re looking for a burner to take the top off a defense, Campbell is your guy. He is 6’0” and 215 pounds and runs a blazing 4.3 40. He struggled last year in Ohio State’s offense due to their issues in the passing game, but this season he has been on point. In 2018 http://www.oaklandraidersteamonline.com/johnny-townsend-jersey , Campbell has 673 yards and nine touchdowns, averaging almost 11 yards per catch.Campbell’s speed and big-play ability profile him as a #1 wideout a la Stefon Diggs. He could go at the late first or early second round, and is as legitimate a deep threat as this draft has.Marquise Brown, OklahomaThis Sooner wideout has been a star for the last few seasons in Norman, catching passes from Baker Mayfield and now Kyler Murray. Brown is a similar player to Parris Campbell, in that he is a dynamic playmaker and runs a 4.3, but he’s an inch shorter than Campbell. Brown, though, has more reliable hands. This season, Brown has 956 yards and nine touchdowns, and is averaging a cool 18 yards per catch. I believe Brown profiles as a slightly larger Tyreek Hill with just a sliver less straight-line speed.Anthony Johnson, BuffaloThe 6’2”, 207-pound Johnson is one of the best small-school prospects in the coming draft, out of Khalil Mack’s alma mater. He spent his first two collegiate seasons at the JUCO level, but broke out in a big way as a junior, with 1,356 yards and 14 touchdowns as a junior. This year, his production has dipped, with only 699 yards but nine scores.Johnson is an elite route runner at all points in the route tree, and is at his best with intermediate routes but is rapidly improving as both a deep threat and with underneath patterns as well. He isn’t a burner with a 4.5 40, but his route-running is what will put him over the top. A better 40 time at the combine could vault him into first-day consideration, but for right now he’s a second or third round prospect.